I love sharing inspiring stories and celebrating people forging a new path for themselves. I can always find something to learn from their experiences, and the shape their growth has taken. That’s why I love the People You Should Know series in the exclusive section of the YBC® app; it introduces subscribers to people making a difference in the world in new and interesting ways, or those who followed their passions against the odds. From entrepreneurship, to sustainability and travel, the interviews give readers a chance to learn from people who’ve been there and can encourage you to start making your own progress.
In May, we featured the work of Stephen O’Shea and Taylor Grieger, childhood friends who reunited after Taylor’s military service as a Navy Rescue Diver to sail Cape Horn to raise awareness for veteran suicide and help Taylor navigate a PTSD diagnosis. Hell or High Seas is a documentary film in production about their journey; watch the trailer here .
In a follow up interview, Stephen told us about Taylor’s experience in the military, followed by his anxiety in returning home and battling PTSD. After a panic attack, Taylor asked Stephen, who’d been conducting interviews and research with veterans of the Iraq and Afghanistan wars as part of his PhD studies, if he’d heard of other veterans experiencing panic attacks and extreme physical responses. Taylor felt isolated, thinking he was the only one suffering in this way. Stephen details the birth of their plan to conquer one of the most challenging sailing routes as a way for Taylor to process and heal in this article he wrote. His piece also includes a teaser video from the full-length film, Hell or High Seas, which they intend to share to help lift the stigma on PTSD and reduce feelings of isolation in veterans who may be suffering.
We asked Stephen:
How does Taylor describe his experience with PTSD?
Taylor describes his PTSD as very physical. Which makes sense, because when your bloodstream is flooded with epinephrine, the result is physical. A quickened heart-rate, increased blood-pressure, shortness of breath, dilated pupils - you feel the blood literally rush to your face.
This is most likely due to the pace of life that Taylor experienced in the Navy. He and his fellow rescue swimmers had adapted to working 16-hour flight schedules; they were frequently denied more than four hours of consecutive sleep; and their job was jumping out of helicopters. They ran off endorphins, epinephrine, cortisol, and supplements that simulated their effects. Taylor’s adrenal and pituitary glands had adjusted to producing excess amounts of “fight-or-flight” hormones, so when he left the military those glands didn’t just stop producing. They kept right at it, and when Taylor couldn’t provide an outlet for those pent-up hormones, they would release of their own accord.
Everyone’s experience of PTSD is different, and PTSD is not limited to soldiers or the result of battle trauma. Hormones cause chemical reactions in the body, and their effect is physiological. And over-exposure to these hormones can have lasting effects on the brain. Cortisol, in particular, can measurably shrink the hippocampus and hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis: two regions of the brain that are instrumental to the production and regulation of hormones. The results, then, can be incredibly complex - but the most common are feelings of depression, anxiety, moodiness, and frustration, as though you are losing control of yourself.
How was Taylor supported by the military when he was discharged? What does that transition look like?
After much ado, Taylor was permitted his hard-earned terminal leave. This is essentially paid vacation that you can apply toward the end of your service. This totaled to about a month, most of which was spent in San Diego, compiling paperwork and service records for the VA. After that, he returned home to Texas, unemployed and without pay, to try and gather his bearings.
Approximately six months before his release, he attended a course called TAP (transition Assistance Program). It was a five-day course that taught enlisted personnel how to apply for government jobs.
How much experience in sailing did you and Taylor have before embarking on your journey? What did preparation for the trip look like?
Taylor had used sailing as a method of decompression throughout his service in the military. He still hadn’t completed more than a handful of overnight sails, though, and had done nothing close to even our first leg of sailing - a 600 mile, week long sail across the Gulf of Mexico. I, meanwhile, had only sailed a few times in my life! Still, I figured if you’re going to set sail into some of the most dangerous and volatile waters on the planet, who better to have beside you than a Navy rescue swimmer? (and in the South Pacific, we had John Rose as well - so two rescue swimmers!)
Preparation for the journey consisted mostly of refurbishing and reinforcing our boat, the Ole Lady. We bought her used and abused for borderline scrap, and rebuilt her from the bottom up. Everything from the engine to the cushions inside were mounted and sewn by yours truly. The experience, the tactical preparations, and the rest of it, we figured, would come as we went.
There’s an old sailing axiom that we were trying to live by, leading up to our departure date. It goes, “If you wait for your boat to be ready, you’ll never leave the harbor.” There’s always better equipment, newer sails, more experience to be had when you’re preparing for a long voyage. But sometimes the trick is knowing when to simply cast off your lines and learn as you go.
What were some of the biggest challenges on your voyage?
We overcame hurricanes, pirates, bureaucracies, starvation, and each other, and there were countless "breaking points" throughout the voyage where we were ready to give up and cut our losses. But we kept fighting and pushing forward because the farther we got, the more this voyage grew beyond ourselves. We were sailing for our brothers, sisters, family and friends who were getting out of the military. We were in a position to help them, and so we were obligated to try with everything we had.
Pirates? Can you tell us more about that experience?
The best retelling of that experience would be on our blog. What I can say, though, is that modern day pirates of third world countries are driven to acts of desperation by poverty. These aren’t the skeleton-flag-flying anarchists and revolutionaries of the 18th century.
Our encounter was off the Pacific coastline of Colombia, just north of the city Buenaventura. There’s a stretch of mangroves there, about a hundred miles long, that pirates are known to operate out of. We were advised by multiple parties to keep a good 20-50 miles offshore for that stretch, but we had been pushed inland by harsh headwinds and the Humbolt Current (which was running at 5-6 knots for a good stretch of that coastline!). We were between a rock and a hard place, and it’s a miracle that we came out of it unscathed.
The Skeleton Crew Sailing team in Patagonia
What was the most rewarding part of the journey?
Navigating the channels and caletas of Patagonia made every single struggle worthwhile. We dropped anchor in inlets few humans have ever seen before, much less set foot on. And we hiked mountains, crawled through glaciers, and walked across landscapes at the edge of the world. The scenery was beyond anything I even though possible in this world. It was like we'd stepped out of reality into an imaginary world.
Can you tell us about a moment that you considered turning back, throwing in the towel, or giving up - and what brought you out of it?
When we pulled into Valparaiso, Chile, after a month at sea, we were bedraggled. We had already made the decision to throw in the towel. We were going to scrap the boat and fly home. Our boat was sinking, our engine was continually breaking, we'd had a fire on the boat during our last leg, and we'd all but starved because of our meager provisions and non-existent budget. Then we learned that another one of Taylor's Navy buddy's had committed suicide. After that, despite all we'd been through, we couldn't just give up. And so we found a way to keep fighting.
What aspirations do you have for the life of this project?
We're hoping to tour the documentary around the nation, and to military bases world wide. But we're also hoping to make it highly accessible to the public. Then, once the documentary is out into the world, we'd like to start taking veterans on expeditions to help ease their transition into the civilian world.
Where can people find out more about Hell or High Seas, and how can they show their support?
You can read the rest of our interview with Stephen in the YBC® app. If you haven’t already, download, opt-in, head to the Media section, and explore the Exclusive content section.